It’s about Civility – NOT Political Correctness
June 2, 2018
On May 29, ABC cancelled it’s highest rated television show – the 2018 reboot of Rosanne after the show’s star, Rosanne Barr, posted a tweet about Valerie Jarrett, an African-American woman who was a senior adviser to President Obama throughout his presidency. Ms. Barr wrote if the “muslim brotherhood & planet of the apes had a baby=vj.”
Disclosure: This is not a commentary or judgment of Rosanne Barr. I have not watched any episodes of the 2018 show, not because I dislike Ms. Barr or any of the other actors on the show, but because I didn’t like the previous version of the show from two decades ago. It just didn’t appeal to me. No judgment on the actress, her political beliefs, or the content of the television show.
Not surprisingly following the show’s cancellation, I heard many people comment that our society has become “too politically correct.” I beg to differ. I don’t think this is about political correctness. I think it is about simple human decency and civility. I am very uncomfortable with people who make fun of others because of race/ethnicity, gender, sexual preferences, and religion.
A few years ago, a friend and I saw the Book of Mormon in Chicago when we were there for a meeting. The play had won the Tony Award for Best Musical, and the touring company had not yet been to Dallas. It’s rare that we ever have any free time on business trips, even in the evenings. So when my friend and I discovered that we had a free evening in Chicago with the Tony Award winning musical in the city, we got tickets. Another disclosure: What my friend and I knew about the musical was that it had won the Tony Award, and it had something to do with the Mormon Church. As someone who enjoys the theater, I appreciated the talented actors and musicians who performed in the play, but was honestly uncomfortable during the performance. I wasn’t uncomfortable because of the profanity (I’m not a prude) or because I share the same beliefs as the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter day-Saints (I don’t). But, I do have friends and colleagues who are Mormon, and frankly, I don’t like it when anyone’s beliefs or religion is mocked, whether they are Mormon, Muslim, Jewish, Catholic, Muslim, Islamic, Buddhist, Christian, etc.
While I can appreciate humor and can laugh uncontrollably at Tina Fey or Amy Poehler, I am uncomfortable when comedians say something that I consider “cringe worthy.” Case in point, I have no respect for anyone associated with the current administration, but I found nothing funny about Michelle Wolf’s performance at the 2018 White House Correspondents’ Dinner.
I believe that humor is important. I laugh often, most frequently at myself. I just think it should be respectful. There’s precedence for respectful political humor. Dana Carvey, who portrayed President George H.W. Bush on Saturday Night Live during the senior Bush’s presidency, is reported to have become friends with the former president and was invited to the White House by the president and his wife, Barbara. After the senior Bush left the presidency, he even appeared on SNL with Carvey.
In his book, The Restless Wave, Senator John McCain said, we have a “scarcity of humility” in today’s politics and we have compromised civility in service of anger. Once again, I find myself agreeing with the senator from Arizona. I have been on the receiving end of hurtful and harsh words. I’m not overly sensitive. I have a healthy sense of self-esteem, but I’m tired of the excuse that we should suck it up and take an “ass chewing” and “get over it.” When you’re feeling vulnerable, harsh, derogatory words can feel abusive. In the book, Choosing Civility, the author P.M. Forni, cofounder of the Johns Hopkins Civility Project, said “a lapse in civility can be anything but trivial when we look at it from the receiving end. I concur. I’ve been on the receiving end.
The Bible is filled with references about treating people with respect and civility. The English Standard Version of Luke 6:31 says, “And as you wish that others would do to you, do so to them.” Nowhere can I find a version of that verse that says, you only have to do this if the others have the same political and religious beliefs, ethnicity, or sexual preferences as you.
On Friday, I spent the day with friends in Austin for a strategic planning meeting for the Texas Leadership Collaborative, an initiative that we established in 2016. My friend Stewart, who is one of the organizers, is very good about having us start our meetings with a “grounding” exercise. Stewart had made arrangements for us to hold our meeting at the Lady Bird Johnson Wildflower Center, a beautiful piece of property that reflects the former First Lady’s love of wildflowers. Before our meeting (and before the temperature in Austin reached 99 degrees for the day), we walked through the grounds of the Center, listening to the birds’ chirp and the sounds of the periodic wind chimes, smelling the scents of the flowers, and feeling the occasional breeze. After our grounding exercise, we reviewed our Collaborative value statement.
As leaders, we support the inherent value of each individual and believe in the collective wisdom of the group with purpose and passion.
As leaders, we believe in creating safe spaces for discovery. We strive to stimulate and influence one another by strengthening each member and their contribution.
As leaders, we accept the responsibility to voice our opinions while support each other’s right to authenticity, creativity and learning.
Together, we believe in collaboration and cooperative interaction to find common ground and produce meaningful outcomes.
My friend, Mary Ann, another of the Collaborative organizers, often reminds us to “speak the truth with love.” In doing so, we have created an environment where we feel safe to speak candidly, disagree and challenge each other.
Thank you Mary Ann, Courtney, Stewart, Marissa, Lindsay, Cary and Jen. I am so fortunate to have you in my life. You keep me grounded when the behavior of others seems less than civil.
