The Future is Female
July 15, 2018
Last week, I read a post to me on Facebook written by my friend, Mendy. She was commenting on one of my recent blog posts about some “good/sage” advice she had given me when she was “20 something.” Her post read, “Where the hell did that Mendy version go??? I am now sitting in bed squinting at this damn screen with a forty something ‘I haven't done enough’ anxiety.”
When I read that, I was instantly transported back to a very similar conversation two years ago in my office with Marissa, another friend and colleague. Marissa had uttered almost the exact words to me. Both Mendy and Marissa are accomplished young women, who have gained the respect of peers and leaders in their respective fields, while managing homes and motherhood, yet they don’t feel like they have “done enough.” This is probably not uncommon among intelligent career women with a modicum of ambition. I wish I could say that I’m surprised, but I’m not. I remember feeling the exact same way when I was in my 40s and managing a career and family obligations. What is surprising, and unfortunate, is that 20 years later, not much has changed.
When I was at the point in my career that Mendy and Marissa are now, I worked for my friend, Sue. Sue is only a few years older than me, but she had catapulted to the top of the injury and violence prevention field with some groundbreaking studies, that resulted in a national and international expert reputation. Through no fault of her own (because she has always been quick to share the limelight with her colleagues), Sue’s success was intimidating. Plus, I had an up close and personal view of how much harder Sue worked than her male counterparts.
Since this is a blog dedicated to positivity, I won’t dwell on the continued messages in our society that make women feel inadequate. What I will point out is the gratitude that I feel to Sue for her guidance and friendship. I credit Sue for shaping my career and introducing me to a cadre of other wise women leaders, who have provided counsel and direction throughout my career. Sue is the person that got me involved in the Safe States Alliance, which led to me meeting a host of other professionals, both older and younger. I have had the privilege to work with amazing staff in Oklahoma and Texas, as well as other colleagues across the U.S., Canada, and other countries. I have learned from all of them. They are all directly or indirectly associated with any success that I’ve had.
Starting with my mother and sister, I have been fortunate to be surrounded by strong women who have not let gender define their roles or worth. Additionally, I would be remiss if I didn’t acknowledge my male “feminist” friends and colleagues who have helped pave the way for us.
My best friend gave me a t-shirt that I wear often that says, “The Future is Female.” I love it!
While the ultimate “glass ceiling” has yet to be broken for women, there have been advancements that hopefully, will make it better for women of the Gen X, millennial, and centennial generations. I hope to witness more advancements for my daughter, nieces, and any future granddaughters, as well as Mendy’s and Marissa’s daughters.
Until then, I wish that Mendy and Marissa could see themselves through my eyes. If they could, I think they would be amazed! They, along with all of the other friends and colleagues who have influenced my life, are my inspiration.
